Tuesday, January 20, 2009

The urge is back....


Its been months since my last insomniac "attack". Woke up this morning bright and feels fully "charged" even though I slept at about, what I should think 3 or 4 am. Strange..... But then again there are stranger things happening around in the world, so I should not say that the "fully charged" feeling is strange.

During this time, what kept me up was the sudden urge for a ciggie!! It has been more than 7 years (has it?) since the last time I light up any form of tobacco: cigars, ciggies and shisha; which is BTW, I'm pretty proud of. I find myself some how changed now with regards to ciggies and people who do smoke them.

Yeah, yeah, I know that I might stun some people reading here since not many of you do know this side of me. And how many of you people that read this blog knows that I've got a tattoo as well? Well I do, and I'm not telling you where its located but still its not a big deal, as they say "the difference between people with tattoo is that they don't care if you've got one as well!" And oh! Mum found out in the end (the tattoo, NOT the ciggies) and all she had to say was; didn't it hurt? Which pretty much surprised me to finally find that mum was a cool person as well despite being in her 50s! LOL!

On her finding out about ciggies and me. Well let's just put it, its better that she doesn't know but then again she might know, just that she has not caught me red handed... LOL! Not that I wanted to be caught! When I started, it wasn't peer pressure as all (well 90%) of people I know aren't smokers. As all teenagers, I got curious and decided then I like it then. Thinking back, I surprised myself at how many sticks a day I had during my uni years; no thanks to friends who'll ask if I'm going for ciggies every time we see each other for breaks or after meal times! That was good times then spent with uni friends. Its still good times spent with them, just that ever since we finish uni, most of us stop smoking... I know, strange.... But the reasons for quiting for me was financial (ciggies are bloody $$$$!), health (fingers smell, out of breath etc etc) and work issues (non-smoking areas pop out every where now) . Did you know smoking cause stress to be even worst? Something to think about huh?

Now I try to stay clear of smoky places. Even more after we have Owen. We still have a box of high quality Cuban cigars, a gift from a friend. Think we'll save it for a very special occasion eh? hehehe... Till then, I'll try my best to resist.

5 comments:

Emily said...

i succumbed!

The Heart of Paul said...

Shanny DON'T!!

Shanny Khoo said...

Emily,
There are weak moments in our lives. Hope that you could "re-quit" the habit! ;)

Paul,
I'm trying my best and to do that I need to think about FOOD!! LOLZ!

~ mrs lam ~ said...

Shanny,

when the urge is back, think about owen boy instead.... u would not want him to be a second hand smoker...rite? though u do not smoke in front of him, it's better not to do so...

Shanny Khoo said...

Yeah Mrs Lam.. Its hard to resist but I'm trying my best. If I fail (which is highly unlikely), won't be puffing anywhere near my boy or anyother kids. It'll be alone outside! :(